The stuff
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Start Here, Dumbass
What this place is, what it will never ask you for, and why the internet stopped feeling like this.
NEW About 40 seconds -
The International Archive of Questionable Wieners
Badly photographed gas-station hot dogs. Real sausage patents. A curvature chart nobody asked for. One genuinely lovely documentary.
Not built yet Sex joke.Gross. -
Hide the Wiener
Keep a hot dog away from a man with a clipboard. Thirty seconds. No reason.
NEW 30 seconds a go Sex joke. -
Random Music Generator 2000
Scours a database of over four million songs and returns one completely at random.
NEW As long as you can take it Loud. -
The Answering Machine
An answering machine and the people who are still on it. Nine messages. No joke at the end.
NEW Nine messages Actually sad. -
Do Not Open
Do not open this one.
NEW As long as you can stand it -
56K
A modem, a phone line, and fourteen seconds of screaming. Headphones if you've got them.
NEW Fourteen seconds -
Is It Friday?
A website that answers one question. It is correct every single time and it will not elaborate.
NEW One second. Genuinely. -
The Loneliest Guestbook on the Internet
Sign it. Nobody will ever read it.
NEW Two minutes -
DSIM
Pick a screen name. Sign on. See who's around.
NEW Until somebody signs off -
The Dead Mall
Every store in here closed twenty years ago. We got the keys. The lights still work.
A long wander Actually sad. -
The Stache Open
Nine holes. There's a windmill. You know exactly what this is.
Nine holes -
The Helicopter Thing
Hold to go up. Let go to go down. Ruined a generation's grades.
One more try -
LimeWiener
Search for anything. 14 results, all lies, downloading at 4KB/s. Just like you remember.
However long a 3MB file takes at 4KB/s -
Ask Bartleby
A butler. You ask him things. He has been waiting a very long time.
As many questions as you have
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